This is gonna make you want ‘que
April 25, 2008 by Recovering Baptist
On second thought, what doesn’t? Sometimes, my friend and I have Very Important Discussions over weighty matters and help each other make decisions of Great Import. But other times, our AIM conversations are something more akin to this. (bonus points if you know the two songs referenced here):
Me: I’m sorry. The words “horrible” and “barbecue smell” cannot be used together in the same sentence. You fail.
Her: I know what I’m havin’ for lunch.
Me: CORKY’S
Her: HELL YEAH
Me: AMERICA!
Her: FUCK YEAH
Her: WOOOOOOOOOO
Her: *hoists beer to sky*
Her: *redneck yell*
Her: *QUE!!!!!!*
Me: I told Johl we’re going to the renaissance fair, got our name on our underwear.
Her: *waves flag*
Her: *TURKEY LEG*
Her: *FLAGON OF MEAD*
Me: I’M ALL HOPPED UP ON THE CUE!
Her: SHIT YO I AM HOPPED UP ON FLAVOR! *RARRRRRRRR*
Me: TURKEY LEG! FUCK YEAH! Turns out a lot of things have the right number of syllables to fit that…
Clockworktomato: DEAR SIX POUND BABY PIG BUTT, THANK YOU FOR THIS MEAL WE ARE ABOUT TO RECEIVE.
Her: (Dear Baby Jesus, I do not mean to liken thee to pig butt, I just had to show homage to one of the greatest meats on the face of the humble earth)
Me: *crying* You said, “six pound baby pig butt”.
Her: DELICOUS
Her: *slathers with sauce*
Me: Oh pig. Why do you taste so good?
Her: *sops up juice with roll*
Her: *corn on cob*
Her: *smears on face*
Me: You are killing me.
Her: *checkerboard tablecloth*
Her: *ded*
Me: LOLOLOLOL
Her: Jack Handey mode ON: Sometimes I think there should be a religion that worships the pig. But then I remember that this wouldn’t work out at all, because the reason I would worship pig is that it is delicious, and it’s probably not a good idea to eat the thing you worship. So instead I will worship rocks. /end Jack Handey
Me: I’m feelin’ all spiritual and shit now
Her: I so totally am too
Me: I would be willing to tithe to Corky’s.
